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Question. I am 27. I work for an IT company. I was in love with a colleague for the past 2 years. Even she seemed to be deeply in love with me. 2 months ago, she without reason, ruthlessly dumped me and married another guy and is living in Australia currently. I tried reaching her through phone, mail etc., but she has cut all channels of communication with me. I couldn’t take this betrayal too kindly. The agony it caused me, took a toll on my health. I have not been able to work properly and to top it I have been over-eating a lot lately. I have gained almost 10 kgs in these 2 months. I am at a risk of becoming severely obese and doctors said if I continue to over-eat, it is not too far off when I will find it difficult to walk as much as 100 meters without getting tired. I am unable to face people. Failure in love to one side and these weight issues to another side, I am totally devastated sir. Please help me.

Ans. To begin with, please relax first. There is no problem on earth that doesn’t have a solution, so with some help even you can come out of this crisis situation and live a normal life again. As you have already observed, your psychological stress and your weight issues are interlinked. Hunger is monitored by Hypothalamus in the brain. When a person is psychologically stressed, hypothalamus doesn’t function as it is supposed to and some abnormalities can be observed. In such a scenario, a man tends to either eat too much or too little. So 90 out of 100 cases related to weight issues are due to psychological stress. So for you to first gain control of your weight, your psychological stress needs to be addressed. I have devised some good Relaxation Techniques in PranaYoga, learning and practicing which, you can definitely relax your body and mind and counter this psychological stress. Once this issue is resolved, the weight issue would be a cake walk. All The Best.

Question. Sir, my mother is 60 years old. From the day my dad expired, almost a year ago, I have noticed a marked deterioration in my mother’s psychological condition. She is always lost in her world. I see that she talks to herself sometimes, cries for no reason, doesn’t eat or sleep on time. She also has been expressing some kind of a helplessness and I have noticed that she is feeling very lonely. I also feel she is feeling insecure at the very thought that I might marry and leave her like my brother or sister did. They are settled in the US and don’t even visit once a year. My sister is in India currently and is keen on getting me married before she leaves to the US again. She is logical in her place because I will be hitting 30 soon and it is only right that I get married. But I am also worried about my mother. I am scared she may face some issues with my wife and this marriage on the whole considering the kind of situation she is in. I was contemplating remaining single all my life to take care of my mother. Please advise.

Ans. Usually for people aged your mother, loss of spouse is a very big catastrophe which causes them severe emotional trauma and psychological stress. They tend to lose hope in life and speak absurd things concerning life and otherwise. They lose interest in the day to day activities and sometimes find it hard to even care for themselves, which is reason why your mother also doesn’t care to eat or sleep on time. In such a situation it is important that we arouse that desire to live and enjoy life. Pranayoga will definitely help her regain that hope in life again. Coming to the issue concerning your marriage, according to me it is not wise for you to not marry. You have a long life ahead and moreover you remaining single will not only cause you unhappiness, it will also cause a lot of guilt to your mother. So it is not advisable to take any decision in haste. If your mother co-operates and starts showing improvement in her condition through counseling, I advise you go for pre-marital counseling and come to an understanding about yourself and the kind of girl who would ideally suit you and your family setup. If everything goes well, within 15 days your mother will become a normal person again and she herself with find a girl for you and perform your wedding. Come and see me without further delay.

Question. I am 26. I come from a well settled family and I am a major contributor to the business which is running very successfully. I have been a pretty normal person and I have stood my ground despite many ups and downs in life. But lately for the past 3 months, I have been experiencing some really severe mood swings. I go through a really low phase where I feel very sad, totally out of control of myself and also have suicidal tendencies. This feeling doesn’t last very long, I get back to normal in a day or two. I met a doctor recently and he diagnosed me of acute depression and also prescribed antidepressants. I have been on medication but I don’t see any marked improvement in my condition. Is it actually depression, whatever I am going through? Will Pranayoga really help me tackle it?

Ans. Rocky, there is no human on this planet who is perfectly happy always with no form of emotional turmoil. Highs and lows are a part of life and our body and mind are designed perfectly to deal with this wear and tear to an extent. So going through a low phase once in a while isn’t something one should be really bothered about. However, if it lasts for anything more than a couple of weeks, then it is called clinical depression which needs to be addressed with some form of psychotherapy or medication depending on the severity of the condition. Some typical symptoms of clinical depression are:

  1. Very low feeling of self-worth (considering oneself fit for nothing)
  2. Long spells of guilt without any apparent concrete reason
  3. Loss of appetite/ Weight Loss or Over-eating/Too much of weight gain
  4. Inability to indulge in activities or interactions with people which give joy
  5. Loss of concentration or mental stability
  6. Sleep disturbances, lack of sleep
  7. Dwelling too much in the past and worrying or brooding excessively over it
  8. Inability to perform well at work and thereby complicating situations at workplace
  9. Losing rationality and reason in the thought processes
  10. Feeling of hopelessness and suicidal tendencies.

Any of the above conditions if present for a longer duration, need to be addressed and dealt with on priority. Your condition from whatever you have written, I don’t think You are going through Clinical Depression. With PranaYoga you can definitely come out of it if you learn and practice confidence-enhancement, relaxation and anti-depressive techniques. Know how you can invoke that positivity in you and how you can put it to use to achieve success in life.